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A Quarterly Journal
Jeffrey Woodward, Founder & Owner
Ray Rasmussen, General Editor

Volume 12, Number 1, March 2018

Ray Rasmussen
Edmonton, Alberta, Canada

Space Junk & Spider Webs

The headline reads "Space Junk Keeps Fallin' on My Head," reminding me of a golden oldie favourite song.* And so I read on. The article warns that, "If you knew what was going on above your head, you probably wouldn't sleep at night."

I was already having problems sleeping, with spiders spiraling down for a midnight snack, the cat jumping on the bed at odd hours, nightmares from those horror flicks I shouldn't have watched and rehearsing what I might have said to have the final word in my arguments with her.

I now have more to worry about. There are a whooping "1,217,000 objects including whole spacecrafts," up there, ready to plunge to the earth and possibly into my home. Even a small grain of space dust will be moving so fast that it can punch through the ceiling and shatter my cup of coffee, if not something even more imporant.

I dial up NASA to ask whether they can direct one of the smaller objects at the spider who hides every time I reach for the fly swatter. They tell me that the objects fall at random, and abruptly hang up.

don't worry,
NASA has poor aim

the moon dangerously
close to the horizon

1. Previously published in Frogpond.
2. The haiku is after Issa's Don't worry spiders / I keep house / casually, trans. Robert Hass.
3. The song's title and first line are, "Raindrops keep fallin' on my head," by B.J. Thomas.



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